Happy New Year

2010 was a pretty good year, with the highlight of the year being a Poker Cruise. The P&O cruise went from Brisbane to Port Vila. We have always wanted to try a cruise and chose this because if cruising wasn't for us then it was only 7days and we'd have the Poker to keep us happy. As it turns out cruising is great, the complete holiday. The ports you visit are nice but incidental to the trip, it's the on board life that's the most fun. There's never a dull moment and the food is great. We loved it so much we've booked another cruise for May 2011, see Poker Cruises.NET.au .
Here's hoping 2011 is even better.

Another design expert

Received another graphic design request for quote:
"Need someone to make changes to two designs. One is a cd label and the other is a certificate.
Basically it just involves replacing a logo with a logo we have already and removing a watermark. Easy work for someone who knows what he is doing and shouldn’t take longer than 30 minutes."

Amazing, he doesn't know how to do it, but he knows how long it will take.

People's Expectations

I received this request for a quote recently:

Product Photography Sterling Silver Jewellery with Semi precious Stones. Approx 500 units @ 4 mins a unit PLUS photoshopping Necklaces, rings, earrings, pendants. Required for internet catologue Needs to be cost effective.

Four minutes per photo! Not going to be top quality at that speed and she wants PhotoShop work done in that time frame as well.  In those four minutes you also have to pick-up the items, unpack them, check and list them, set up the studio. Then because 500 items x 4 mins is 33 hours (4 days) you have to clean -up each day and set-up again each morning.

You have to wonder if this woman know so much about photography that she can nominate how long each shot should take, why isn't she doing the job herself?

I wonder if 'Cost Effective' is applied to the price of her jewellery.

Try to remember

Why do we allow politicians to get away with this stuff.
After WW2 income tax was raised for the purpose of providing an old age pension. Then a few years later,  under PM Robert Menzies this extra tax was put into general revenue, now after paying that extra tax for decades we are treated like thieves for wanting to collect the pension we paid for.
Twenty years ago we had a youth unemployment problem, our politicians solved this by raising the school leaving age and retiring lots of people of 55 years and older. And promised by the end of the century everybody would be retiring at age 60.  As a result we now have a shortage of tradesmen because kids are staying on at school. Plus the cost of funding pensions is too hard because they never put the funds aside so, instead of retiring at 60 years the retirement age is now 67 years.
But of course if you are a politician retiring from parliament, regardless of your age you will collect $100,000 pa pension immediately for the rest of your life even if you take-up another job.

Child Prostitution

I'm about to set about rebuilding the website for 'The Grey Man', it's a registered charity working to stop the trafficking of children.  The name Grey Man is a miltary term for an undercover operative, the organisation rescues children in covert operations and cares for them in safehouses. If you look on Wikipeadia you can see that 40% of prostitutes in Thailand are children, that's tens of thousands of children. Servicing the Western sex holiday market, can you imagine; fat old German men holidaying on young Thai girls and boys. 

It's a sicken trade that has to be stopped. Thailand isn't the only country, it's rife throughout Asia, and even in Europe 20-30% of prostitutes are children in Moscow and the Ukraine. In the US estimates are that 162,000 prostitutes are children. Read for yourself at: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Child_Prostitution.

Don't just sit there do something. Even if it's only a donation.

Censorship

Censorship has reared its ugly head again, the Australian Government's proposed internet filter that was to stop child porn and pedophilia has now spread to blocking Euthanasia websites. This is the problem with censorship, it starts out with laudable aims and ends up a political tool.
Australian censors back in the late 50's edited 'the carpetbaggers' novel replacing 'fuck' with 'screw' and later in the novel 'screw' with 'have'. They edited 'he fondled her soft brown nipple' to  'he fondled her soft brown ', is that an improvement?
As horrid as child porn is, censorship is a slippery slope to madness, it didn't achieve anything in the 50's and 60's, it won't achieve anything today. We don't want to be like China with political masters dictating how we should think.

Baby Boomers Double Standards

Queensland's LNP Shadow minister David Gibson recently said "It never ceases to amaze me when I listen to the baby boomers who are incredibly selfish in expecting that other generations will pay for their retirement". Well David, when we 'baby boomers' started work there was no superannuation and we started work on the promise that our taxes would pay for a pension when we retired. It was only in the later years that super became available, for most of my working life superannuation was only available to management and often only senior management. David Gibson if you are so keen not to be selfish, how about you start by paying back all the contributions the government has made to your super that exceed the standard 9%. Next, how about you refuse to draw a pension until you reach 67. Double Standards it's all we ever get from politicians with their noses in the trough. When I'm Emperor politicians will be paraded through the streets twice a year for the public to throw rotten fruit at them.

Customer Service

Eddy Odden, former CEO of Leo Burnett Advertising Agency
recently observed:

• Deliver the brand promise:
• Always under promise and over deliver.
• Make sure the customer's shopping experience with you is a positive one in every respect
• What your ad promises must be followed through in-store and with the after sales service.
• Do not underestimate the importance of your staff and staff training in meeting your business goals.

 I was pleased to read this as I've been grumbling about the lack of training for a sometime now. I also noted in this month's Scientific American Jeffery Sach's article extols the virtues of Check Lists. Pointing out that successful surgery and airline crews depend on Check Lists and decision trees. These e-Training Manuals I've been producing for Gull Publishing are full of exactly that: Check Lists and decision trees.

Customer Service

I'm still knocking out more books for e-Training Manuals, I've just completed  a Customer Service Manual and feel like sending it to most local retailers. So many businesses have no concept of how to deal with customers and I believe the root cause is the lack of training of staff. Employees are just let loose on customers on the premise that everyone knows how to serve customers. Well, no they don't. Even if they do, they still need training in that company's ways. Training will be enforced when I'm Emperor.

Aircraft website re launched

I've just finished re-building an Aviation website Aircraftphotos.biz. It now has aviation related jokes, odd ball things spotted on the web, memories from old pilots and of course lots of aircraft photos. Have a look even people who aren't that mad about aircraft will find interesting things there. Plus some of the jokes are really good.

http://www.prlog.org/10551536-aviation-website-re-launched.html

Crying Wolf

We are often reminded on TV that we must obey the road works signs in particular the reduced speed limits. And now police cars are being stationed along side road works to reinforce the message, what a waste of police resources. Despite all this effort most people still don't slow down until they see the police car. So what's going on? The TV ads stress that the reduced speed limits are there to protect the road workers, does this mean the public doesn't care about the road workers? No, I believe the road workers don't care about road workers. Most people don't reduce speed when they encounter these road work signs simply because a) they place them too far ahead of the road works, b) so often there are no road works, they've just left the signs up.
If road workers care about their safety they should be vigilant about covering up the signs when they are not actually working.It's called crying wolf.
The Bruce highway on the Sunshine Coast has been in a state of disrepair for years yet the speed limit remained 110kph except for one particularly bad section where it was reduced to 100 khp (as if that would make any difference). The recently the road was resurfaced, yet for weeks the speed limit was reduced to 80 khp, why, because the lane marking wasn't finished (there were those temporary plastic lane markers). The road was finally safer than it had been for years yet the speed limit was reduced. These illogical rules and behaviours are why drivers ignore speed limits.
This will change when I'm Emperor.

Good Business Advice

As I continue to work on these Business Manuals for e-Training Manuals I'm struck by the common sense expressed in these manuals, but at the same time I realise how few businesses apply these principles. I know so many businesses that could benefit greatly from applying these business ideas.
But I guess that's why they remain small businesses that only ever dream of becoming big businesses.

SPAM

Even though I've cranked-up my Spam filter to the point where I'm loosing real emails I still get about five Viagra emails a day, all from the same place.

1. How do they get through when my real mail is being effected?
2. More importantly why do these spammers believe that if you don't want to buy after one email that you are more likely to buy if they send you five everyday? Makes no sense, even if I wanted Viagra the last people I'd buy from are these spammers.
3. Why do they send it to me with an .au address, don't they know that in Australia, thanks to our government subsidy I can buy ALL my drugs for far less than any Canadian Pharmacy?

Why, Why!!!!!!!!!

Why do people insist on using multiple exclamation marks? An exclamation mark is also a full stop (period to yanks) which means it's the end of the sentence. Therefore the next exclamation mark is an empty sentence. An exclamation mark is for use where the preceding text is surprising not to lend emphasis. Multiples just look DUMB.

Asian Zoos

I've just read a BBC article on the web regarding the spread of Tiger farms in China it seems there are 10,000 Tigers in farms and just 3,000 in the wild. Combine this with the article in National Geographic (Jan10) about the Malaysian world-wide kingpin of illegal wildlife trade and an simple BBC story takes on a sinister look.
Apparently it costs about $5000pa to raise a Tiger and just $1 for the bullet to shoot a wild Tiger, and there are no checks that will show the difference between Tiger bits sold from farmed Tigers and wild Tigers so, these zoos can easily act as fronts for poaching. If this all seems like a storm in a tea cup think again, the world-wide trade in illegal wildlife is worth more than the world-wide illegal drug trade. Plus the penalties for wildlife trading are trivial.
With China's prosperity raising rapidly, the Chinese obsession with stupid ancient  remedies is likely to kill-off our remaining wild-life. And how ridiculous are these beliefs; a Tiger is a powerful animal therefore if I eat its penis I will become virile or a Rhino's horn sticks up therefore if I eat powdered Rhino horn my dick will stick up.
Grow up.

Business Training Manuals

Back hard at work doing Training Manuals for Gull Publishing,

 

I've also built a website to market the manuals www.e-trainingmanuals.com.au.
Now I've got to do the manuals to fill up the website, there's heaps of them. So far as you can see from the covers above I've completed How to become a successful Consultant, How Write Training Manuals and How to do a training Needs Analysis. Only another dozen to go. :)

Talking Websites

Hands up all those people who hate websites that talk AT you. Droning on while you fumble around trying to the mute button or worst still those sites that don't provide a mute button.
When I'm emperor you will only be allowed to have sites where hearing the audio is a visitor option, 'click here' to listen to audio presentation.

Idiots on the Road

It's about time the police acknowledged that speed per se does not kill. You can drive at 200kmh without an accident, speed only makes any accident far worse. It's the way people drive that's the problem not the speed itself.
If police would stop lazying about in radar traps revenuing and get on the road, pull over those drivers cutting-in, tailgateing and wandering over lanes and centre lines the road toll will actually drop.

New to Blogging

G'Day People,
I'm going to have a semi daily ramble on whatever's getting up my nose or occasionally making my day happy.
If you don't want to be notified of my blog just let me know and I'll take you off the list.
John Mason
aka The Grumpy Designer